The Food Bowl

This morning Tess (my yorkie) was growling and barking at me like she always does when she wants something. I asked her what she wanted and she immediately took me to the laundry room and showed me her empty food bowl. She knows which bowl is for food and which bowl is for water. She will scratch the one she wants filled. I think it’s amazing. But don’t all dog owners or parents of children think that they have the most amazing pets or children? I opened the food bin and put just a tiny bit of food in the bowl. Then I looked at her with my eyebrows raised and very sternly but lovingly said, “that’s all you get fatty fatty two by four”. As I walked away I began to chuckle. #1 because I was calling my dog names. And #2 because well, I was talking to my dog, and calling her names. Then I was reminded of when I am thirsty or hungry, for God. I am so glad He doesn’t just give me a tiny bit, or ignore my pleas, or call me names. I am thankful that He fills me exactly when I need it, and He doesn’t just give me a tiny bit but He gives me more than enough, for that day, for that moment. It’s my job to come back to the food bowl everyday to eat and drink what He has for me. If I’m so busy running around doing stuff, even good stuff, and I don’t come to the laundry room and take time to eat then I get tired. I get hungry. I get cranky, very cranky. I don’t have anything to give to those in need, because I myself am in need. Take time to go to the laundry room today, tomorrow, and every day. This is where you will be filled with exactly what you need for that day. It might be love, forgiveness, patience, kindness, mercy, boldness – but whatever it is…eat, drink of His presence and goodness. I hope that one day I will be so full of Him that he sings to me, “fatty, fatty two by four, can’t get through the kitchen door”.

Seasons

Seasons or as some would refer to them as either being in the valley or on the mountain top. No matter what your age, race, or gender, we all go through seasons. Things are either really good, or really bad, or going in either direction quickly. We have seasons in our career, in marriage, raising children, or health. But I have found that it’s what I learn in a season that is important. I believe that God allows us to go through seasons in our life to grow. I believe that in every season there is something that we can learn, and then take that nugget of wisdom and use it for His kingdom to help someone else. How long you stay in a season depends on how long you take to listen and learn. Sometimes we have to learn from our mistakes. Sometimes we need to learn to forgive. Sometimes we need to learn how to suffer, and suffer well. I remember having little babies that completely relied on me. I remember sleepless nights, crying and whining, potty training, temper tantrums, food battles. But I also remember the sweetness of when a child wakes in the morning and the first thing they want is a long tight hug from mom. I remember making a decision to not focus on what needed to be done in the house or the laundry that needed to be washed and only focus on my baby. My baby who would only be little once. I thought everything always needed to be cleaned and organized, that things needed to be done before I could enjoy my time with my child. I was wrong. Instead God showed me how to be selfless. How to put others before me. How to love without expecting anything in return. How to stay the course and be strong & courageous even in the ‘terrible twos’. Growing children is about putting someone else’s needs before yours. It’s a season in life that reaps immeasurable benefits. My kids are older now and just spent a week with family out of town. I received a phone call one day from my sister in law. The kids had spent the night with her and she called first thing the next morning and her question was, “how did you do it?”. She went on to say that she had the best time having the kids over and she wanted to know what we did to raise such great kids. In that moment, I didn’t think about all the battles we had over trying new food. I didn’t think about the gazillion nights we had trying to keep my oldest in his bed. I didn’t think about the falling out, screaming over not getting a toy in the store. Instead my heart was full of joy that maybe we did something right along the way. We stayed consistent. It was a season, and we made it through. Marriage seasons have been written about before being compared to the seasons of weather. Spring, Summer, Winter, Fall. Everyone is in one season or transitioning into another. I remember early in our marriage feeling like we were in the Fall. We didn’t know how to communicate with each other. We both wanted the other to make the move and that meant that neither of us were moving. We slowly crept into Winter. I remember thinking that this was not the marriage I had dreamed about having. I wanted more. He wanted more. We began to talk about our differences. We worked on our marriage. There were hard times. Times of listening, not speaking. Times of dealing with past hurts. Times of letting go of unrealistic expectations. Learning how to speak each other’s love language. Seasons. Each season now meant growing together and learning more and more about the man I loved. We celebrate 21 years of marriage this week and it has completely, honestly, wholeheartedly been the best years of my life. But if we had never learned how to recognize and grow in our seasons, I would not have the best friend in my life that I get to enjoy waking up to everyday. Learn to embrace your season. I see it like riding a roller coaster. I’m sitting in the front seat, buckled up with my hair blowing and my hands straight in the air. I’m climbing high. The view is beautiful. I can see the greatness of life with God. I reach the top and immediately see how everything has been worth it. Then BAM!!! My smile is gone, my hair is a mess and I’m holding on for dear life as I begin the downward spiral that seems will never end. It’s bumpy and uncomfortable, dark and lonely. I can’t control it. But then I quickly am reminded that it’s just a ride. It is what you make of it. God is with me and He will never leave me. In every dark place, may you find God’s strength. In every mountaintop, may you be thankful and joyous and help someone in need. In every season may you find God’s will.

I'm still in my 30's...

It's getting close to my birthday. Every year my husband doesn't say a whole lot about the upcoming celebration. Usually because he is going to try and surprise me or he's planning to just take me away. I prefer the 'take me away'.
I don't like surprises. I never have. I might like TRUE surprises, but no one can ever really truly surprise me. I always figure it out. I can't help it. It just happens, you know in my brain, it figures everything out.

When I think about why I don't like surprises, it boils down to basically one thing. Someone somewhere planned this whole thing, probably by them self, worked for weeks, had to spend way to much time that they could have spent on something more productive than surprising me, had to deal with way to much stress on my account, is out way too much money, and who wants a big fuss and be the center of attention?

Don't get me wrong, I LOVE getting together with family and friends but not just when it's about me. I'm the person who gets the enjoyment out of planning the event for someone else. I like the behind the scenes work. I like to plan and execute a great shindig full of fun & surprises. So I have devised a plan for my upcoming day of birth celebration.

Of most my friends, I'm not in the 40's Club yet with them. I find ways to continually remind them when they are sharing with me their list of bodily decaying aspects that come with being over 40 that I wouldn't know what they are talking about because, "I'm STILL in my 30's". I enjoy being able to say that. I enjoy it ALOT! I like to rub it in actually.
So that sparked a thought a couple days ago.
I don't want a big gloom and doom, black headstones gothic kinda 40th birthday party next year. So to avoid that I decided that I would have a "I'm still in my 30's" Party. We could celebrate my youth one more year and I had found another way to rub it in...again.

I think it's a great idea. I get to plan my own birthday party. No one has to do anything but show up. And next year...I'll let my sweet hubby take me away.